Halfway Out of the Dark - More Joy Day 2016

[purplefringe]

Happy More Joy Day, everyone! <3

I have never made anything for More Joy Day before, but have wanted to ever since I first found out about it. And this year, I have a vid! \o/ I didn't, technically, make it for today, but this seemed a good time to post it, particularly given that it was already out of date the moment I finished it.


You see, I had a LOT of feelings about the 2015 Doctor Who Christmas Special. A LOT of feelings. So many feelings, in fact, that I proceeded to go back and, er, rewatch every DW Christmas Special since 2005. (Well, I skipped The End Of Time because I did not have the energy for it, but I watched all the others). It was a wonderful experience, and I noticed all sorts of interesting things, particularly relating to certain repeated themes, and to the vast differences between RTD and Moffat's approach to the concept of a 'Christmas Special', and the differences in my own reactions to things now and eight, nine, ten years ago. Rewatching them, particularly the older ones, reminded me intensely of all sorts of things I used to think and feel. I might write about that sometime. (Or maybe I'll just write 'WHY DID MARTHA NEVER GET A CHRISTMAS SPECIAL. WHY DID NINE NEVER GET A CHRISTMAS SPECIAL' over and over again.) In the meantime, I livetexted alllllll my feelings to the ever-patient such_heights, who woke up one morning to discover something like 105 messages from me. From just one episode. Sorry (not sorry). Anyway, I rewatched all these episodes, and as I was doing so, I realised that really, honestly, truly the 'true meaning of Christmas', for me, is Doctor Who.

Ever since 2005, Doctor Who is what I have most looked forward to about Christmas. It is the one immovable thing around which my whole Christmas holiday is planned. I am Jewish, and I come from a Jewish family, and - perhaps more importantly, as lots of Jews do do Christmas in some way - I come from a distinctly unfestive family. (We don't even do Chanukah properly. We're pretty bad at birthdays too.) So there is nothing at all about Christmas Day, or the long lead-up to Christmas Day, that fills me with excitement and gleeful anticipation, or leaves me feeling anything other than exhausted - except Doctor Who. Every year, I spend the whole morning impatient for it, I turn the TV on at least 10 minutes before the episode actually starts, 'just in case', watch it in rapt silence for an hour, then immediately phone such_heights to talk about it for another half an hour or so. We have phoned each other after the Christmas DW episode every year since 2007, I realised recently. Then, after that - after she has put the phone down and gone to resume Christmas with her family - I lie on my bed and continue to think happily about Doctor Who. And then rewatch the episode on iPlayer.

So, even though the Doctor Who Christmas episodes are rarely objectively "better" than most other episodes in their season, they are always magical, and they are always important to me. So I made a vid. As I mentioned - it's kind of out of date now! Should really have been posted on Christmas Day. But as I only started it on Christmas Day, and finished it last week, my choice was either 'wait a year until NEXT Christmas and post it then', or 'steal a TARDIS and go back to Christmas 2015 when I started it' and neither seemed particularly feasible. So I'm posting it now, for More Joy Day. I don't know that it's exuberantly joyful, but it is - show of my heart - full of kindness, and love, and resilience, and wonder, and hope, and those are perhaps quieter joys.


This is for all of you. All of my friends, those of you I have met and those of you I haven't. All of the lovely people who watch my vids and read my meta and leave wonderful comments. And all of you whose vids I watch and whose meta I read and whose fic I read and whose art I enjoy and who generally contribute to making my tiny slice of the world a better place. I love you, I'm glad you exist.

Halfway Out Of The Dark
edited by purplefringe
fandom: Doctor Who
characters: Ten, Eleven, Twelve and Companions
music: Atheist Christmas Carol by Vienna Teng
summary: Don't forget, I love, I love, I love you
content notes: Contains spoilers for all of the DW Christmas Specials (and TEoT2, which I guess was technically a New Year special)

Thank you to such_heights for beta-ing, and putting up with my texts. And also to kaydeefalls for reassuring beta comments.

(Yes, it's Vienna Teng AGAIN. No, I still don't care. I've wanted a vid to this song for aaaaaages, but every winter when it occurs to me to think about vidding it, I'm already embroiled in Festivids. No, of course I'm not procrastinating on my Festivid this year. Why do you ask. What are you talking about. Who even asked you. La la la.)

download: 78MB @ mediafire

stream:

"Doctor Who | Halfway Out Of The Dark" (Watch on YouTube)

Lyrics

It's the season of grace coming out of the void
Where a man is saved by a voice in the distance
It's the season of possible miracle cures
Where hope is currency and death is not the last unknown

Where time begins to fade
And age is welcome home

It's the season of eyes meeting over the noise
And holding fast with sharp realization
It's the season of cold making warmth a divine intervention
You are safe here you know now

Don't forget, don't forget
I love, I love, I love you
Don't forget, don't forget
I love, I love, I love you

It's the season of scars and of wounds in the heart
Of feeling the full weight of our burdens
It's the season of bowing our heads in the wind
And knowing we are not alone in fear, not alone in the dark

Don't forget, don't forget
I love, I love, I love you
Don't forget, don't forget
I love, I love, I love you

Don't forget, don't forget
I love, I love, I love you
Don't forget, don't forget
I love, I love, I love you

Comments

[usuallyhats]

This is so beautiful and warm and moving (it made me cry a lot). I love it. ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

[purplefringe]

♥ Thank you! I am sorry I made you cry! I am glad you shared my feelings though :-) (shoooow!)

[glinda]

This is beautiful and wonderful and the song is so, so perfect for it. I love it so much, thank you for making it and reminding me why I love the show (and the Christmas specials in particular).

[purplefringe]

Aw, thank you! :-) I'm really glad you enjoyed it, and that it helped remind you why this show is so wonderful <3

[just_ann_now]

Mickey! Martha! Danny Pink! And of course, my beloved Eleven. This is making me cry in the best possible way. Thank you!

[purplefringe]

:-) I am sorry I made you cry! But I'm glad you liked it. And OH MARTHA I wish I could have put more of her in there :-( That was the one thing that made me sad, making this. Why didn't she get a christmas special?! Whyyyyyyyy.

[schneefink]

This vid is like a cup of tea or hot chocolate and a blanket and someone sitting next to you in front of a fireplace while it's snowing outside. (I just looked out of the window and it's sunny, weird.) I just watched this year's Christmas Special a few days ago and this is the perfect coda. Wonderfully warm, I love it.

[purplefringe]

Thank you so much! That is the effect I was going for, so I'm glad you feel that way :-)

[starlady]

Oh geez, this was so great, and you did such a lovely job with the editing.

[purplefringe]

Thank you so much!

[juniperphoenix]

Ugh, I've only read the notes and seen what the song is and I'm already tearing up. This is going to be good.

[juniperphoenix]

Aaaagh! Yep, crying. Thank you for this; it's really lovely.

[purplefringe]

<3 Thank you so much! I'm sorry for the crying. Blame Vienna Teng?

[beatrice_otter]

Lovely!

[purplefringe]

Thank you!

from a sort of Dr. Who newbie

[brainwane]

I am very new to Who and enjoyed this vid in a soft, gentle way. What I particularly got out of it was a better understanding of the relationship between the Doctors and the companions, how they share a capacity for wonder and hope and joy together, how that camaraderie eventually turns wordless and how eye contact and a gentle touch communicates everything.

Thank you.

Re: from a sort of Dr. Who newbie

[purplefringe]

Aw yay, welcome to Doctor Who! <3 I'm very happy for you :-D And thank you for this lovely comment - hope and joy and wonder are part of the scaffolding of the show, and I'm so glad they came through for you here.

[gen_is_gone]

This...is truly lovely. As someone who attaches very little religious significance to the holiday (though I was raised mildly Catholic) and instead uses it as a time to cope with grief and be around the good parts of my family, it really, really hit home. It's so beautiful, and quiet, and bittersweet, and your notes and context only make it more so. Thank you for making this.

[purplefringe]

Replying incredibly belatedly to this comment, because I only just saw it! I'm sorry! It was a truly lovely thing to stumble across though! Thank you so much. I'm so glad this vid spoke to you in all the right ways <3

[felis]

Here I am, watching a christmas vid in the middle of summer! :-D But I was missing the show and Twelve in particular and this worked a treat. All the hugs and smiles, aw.

[purplefringe]

Awww thank you! I’m glad this helped! (I have made other vids about my beloved Twelve, if you are still pining! But you have probably found them already :D ) I miss the show too - WHY IS IT OFF AIR FOR SO LONG??